If you want a perfect example of masculinity in the Scriptures, you need to look no further than King David.
As a young man, he kept his flock safe from predators, killing them whenever they attacked. He fought and killed the Philistine Goliath with just a rock and a sling. While serving under King Saul, songs were sung of the “ten thousands” of men he killed in battle. Later, when on the run from Saul, he amassed a small army of followers. And as king of Israel, Israel never had to fear her enemies. By all definitions, David was a “man’s man.”
Yet, in contrast, David was one who danced before the Lord, he played soothing music on the harp for King Saul, and he wrote poetry in the form of many Psalms. Those today who argue for a return to masculinity do not seem to include such attributes in the manliness repertoire. Such things may tend to be viewed as more feminine.
But, when we look at David, not all is admirable. He was clearly an attractive man as many ladies swooned for him. Yet, David amassed many wives and concubines in defiance of God’s command that kings were not to do so. David was also not a good father as evidenced by his lack of properly disciplining his sons. One was a rapist for which David did nothing. Another son, Absalon, murdered that son and then later deposed David from the throne. David was an adulterer and a murderer, killing the husband of Bathsheba to cover his adultery. These are not the marks of biblical masculinity.
In the end, what was it that made David a man to be modeled by men today? It was his faithfulness. David was called a man after God’s own heart. When David was faithful, when he obeyed God out of a sincere love for his Lord, he was victorious in all he did. When he was disobedient and faithless, he sinned miserably. But, when confronted with his sins, he humbled himself before God, repented, and entrusted himself wholly and completely to the Lord’s hand. In this, we find true biblical masculinity.
Masculinity is not merely feats of physical prowess, the ability to lead, or being fearless in the face of enemies. It is not just loudness and brashness before one’s opposition. It encompasses a great many things more. Men are men when they act like men as God designed them to be. Whether a military commander or a desk clerk in an accounting office, a man is a man when he wholly devotes himself to serving the Lord faithfully, in obedience to the commands of God, humble and without reservation.
Yes, we as men should seek to act like men. And, David can serve as an excellent model of what biblical masculinity ought to be. Yet, a man is no less a man if he writes, dances, or plays music as opposed to building things, fighting wars, or being a public leader. Masculinity is being a man after God’s own heart. One who seeks to honor God in all that he does, recognizing his accomplishments are not his own but belong to God alone who established those works in eternity past. He is one who trusts in God’s design for his life and lives it, as a man, not compromising in any manner. He takes his role in society, in the church, in the workplace, and in the home seriously. He looks to God’s Word to define that role and does not abdicate it because culture defines it as “toxic.”
A biblically masculine man leads his family, if he is so blessed to have one, and takes responsibility for their upbringing before God. He does not waffle and leave that role to his wife, whom God has already provided a role, and the abilities to fulfill that role. He leads the family, not as a tyrant, but as the chief servant, being a model for them to serve God and His church in like manner.
A biblical man trusts God’s plan for his vocation and works, not to please the eyes of others or self, but to honor the Lord alone. He is not lazy, he does not leave work for others, he does not make excuses, but he works hard so that he might please God and provide for his family.
One who is biblically masculine humbly serves his church in whatever capacity he is fit for. Whether he cleans the toilets, teaches in Sunday School, serves in a safety ministry, or simply seeks to come alongside his brethren to pray and encourage, he serves the body with joy. He does not ignore needs in the church because the job is too unseemingly or lacks any public recognition. He serves, not for himself, but because he desires to be used of God to bless the body.
Yes, men need to be men. We are awash in a culture that is trying to erase men, to blur the lines between the genders, and trying to turn everyone into genderless drones. Men of God need to step up and be seen as men, to be a nation of Davids that all may see that God made men to be men.
But, let us not become so enamored with the “manliness” of masculinity that we forget the David who bowed before the Lord, wept over his sin, repented of disobedience, played the harp, danced, and wrote poems praising God, and expressed his love for his Lord and Savior.
Let us be true men of God.
(This article was also published at X.com)
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